Sunday 13 October 2019

Letter to my Mum: 5 YEARS ON

Dear Mum,

Its exactly 5 years today you were laid to rest.
Its 5 years you have exited this sinful world to rest in the bosom of the Lord.
Its 5 years of knowing that you died a Christian, as i remember you vividly telling the nurse at the hospital that you were a born again christian.

I am quite sure now, that you knew you would die that fateful day, and i am quite sure now that you had no fear as those last tears trickled down your face. I told you to stop crying that you would be fine, but you shook your head because you knew. I believe you saw the angels as they came to take you away in peace, joy and everlasting happiness.

I am glad to tell you mum, that i only cry occasionally now, especially when i  remember the things you loved. Your favourite movie was "Pretty Woman", so now whenever i watch pretty woman, i remember you with fondness. Its true what they say that time can heal.

Mum, i have finally stopped blaming myself for your death, but i don't think i will ever stop blaming the Nigerian healthcare system, especially Asokoro Hospital for not attending to you immediately, or making us wait for over 2 hours and still not attending to you. I strongly believe every second is important when it comes to saving lives. 

My mum, my gist partner, let me gist you.
So William is now 5 years old, he is in year 1 at school, and he is doing well. He is now very calm and gentle unlike the crying baby you knew. He is very caring and likes to talk a lot. Maybe he will grow up to be a lawyer or an engineer as he also likes to analyse and build things.

Well, after you left us, we welcomed Olamipo into the family; Big brother and wife gave her a french name also. William has a little brother Edward, he is not little anymore, he is 3 now, so full of life and active. Mum, big sister has a son! Yes, Iyi is so full of life.  I think he and Edward are same in character. I imagine both of them being left with grandpa!!! Oh my god!!!!. He likes to eat raw tomatoes like me! Blood is indeed thicker than water. 
He is 2 now and keeps your daughter on her feet. 
We also have Ademilekan, our own little baba. He looks so much like big brother when he was a toddler. Olamipo is the only girl in the clan now, our princess. Any man that would marry her in the future has to contend with all her brothers and cousins. 😅

I must confess mum, i haven't spent time with my nephews and nieces, as i have relocated to the UK to be with Matt, as you eagerly wanted me to. Matt always misses you, you were his paddy out of everyone.He is a good man mum, just like you knew.

Dad is fine. It was so hard for him after you left, but thank God for family. We helped each other pull through. He is keeping healthy and busy. He looks like under 50 now 😂. I haven't seen him in a long while, but thank God for technology. I hope to see him soon. A lot has happened mum, a whole lot of good things have happened after you went to be with the Lord.

During your funeral, so many people came mum! they all had good things to say about you. You were a really nice and generous woman and people testified to it. Every time i remember you, i remember your generousity and it makes me reflect on what is most important in this life; touching lives.

Your children are doing fine, we are all making progress and your 5 grandchildren are also well and healthy.

Mum, am no more that baby of the house you gave birth to. Sometimes i find it hard to believe i am a mum of 2 boys, juggling her home with career. You always knew me to be quite ambitious and career minded, well mum, I am consistently making progress. It is so hard to juggle, and sometimes am envious of those women who still have mothers and can drop off their kids. There are times i just want to rant to my mum about the realities of life, but its OK. I know you are in heaven smiling down on us and you are helping us pull though life.

Finally mum, i just want you to know i love you. I can also speak for big sister and big brother that they love you and you are always in our hearts.

I needed to write this epistle not because you can see it, but because i want to put it out into the universe and because i would like posterity to know how deeply loved you are.

Love you mum! Always will!!!

(picture source: family archives)